Thanksgiving In Baltimore

 Thanksgiving was at the home of one of her step-dad's sisters. 

When she walked in the girl looked around and saw the kids playing in the living room. One little girl, about 6 years old, lay in the floor with her hands propping up on her chin watching TV.

The little girl's mother hollered out laughingly,  "You've got to see this!!!!  Rewind it again!!!"

The girl looked at the TV that the little girl was watching. It was porn.  Deep Throat. 

The girl wondered where her own mother was.  She found her in the kitchen with her step-dad and his uncle and uncles wife. The girls pastor from Illinois. The one who had introduced her mother to this family.

The girl felt sick to her stomach.

Ed - 6

 The nightmares had started in Michigan, followed her to Illinois, and then disrupted her sleep in Baltimore.  

She never knew when she might wake up outside or wake up to her own blood curdling screams. 

Ed accused her of things constantly.  Infidelity. The emotional and physical abuse haunted her sleep.

One night she woke running. She was running and screaming toward a bedroom wall. 

Defying gravity she felt herself up along the middle of the wall clawing and trying to climb up and away from someone or something before landing back down on the carpet.

She stood there for a minute her heavy breaths heaving her chest up and down. 

Then she turned and quietly went back to bed. 

1st Night In Baltimore

 The girl and her mother finally made it to Baltimore late at night. They spent that first night at her new step-dad's mother's mobile home.

The mobile home had 2 bedrooms.  

Upon arriving they all sat in the living room beside the front bedroom.  

Also there that night were two of the new step-dad's brothers and his mother's boyfriend.

There was a little small talk and then the step-dad's mother and her boyfriend went to bed in the front bedroom. The girl's mother and her new step dad went down the hall to the back bedroom. 

That left just the 15 year old in the living room with two grown men. No blankets, no pillows.  One of the men, the youngest, laid down on the couch to go to sleep.

The girl looked around wondering where she was supposed to sleep. There was a wide space on the floor beside the TV so she laid down there.

As soon as she laid down the other brother laid down RIGHT BESIDE her. He didn't push up to her but he was basically spooned up to her!

The girls body went stiff. Horrified.  What is he doing?she thought. Is this normal? Her mother didn't even say anything to her as she left her there with two men. 

She couldn't relax to sleep. She laid there without moving until she heard a noise and she turned her head to look and the youngest brother on the couch was acting out his dream in his sleep. The girl was shocked to see him thrusting into the couch and moaning.

Then from the back bedroom came the rocking as if there was a washing machine with a load off balance. And the squeaking of mattress springs. All the while a 34 year old man was happily snuggled up to the back of a 15 year old. 

The girl eventually was able to fall asleep but it wasn't a very restful sleep. She just wanted to make it through the night. She wondered, is this normal?? 

Ed - 5

 When co-worker's started seeing the bruises they told the girl that she needed to get away.  The girl knew she needed to get away. How exactly was she supposed to do that?  She had no money.  She had no family support. She had no friends.  

Not long before that though she had been chosen to be the person who went with the exterminator to spray the apartments for bugs. There had to be an employee with the exterminator when he entered apartments.  

David had blonde hair and blue eyes. He was a very nice man. He was probably in his late 20's to early 30's. (The girl was 18 by that point, close to 19 maybe. ) He was divorced and had a daughter about 8 years old. 

He had seen the bruises too. He asked the girl if she would like to move in with him.

The girl felt that even though she didn't really know him it surely would be safer.  She said "yes".  And, she was right.  He was a very nice man.  

David was not abusive in any way. He was a very good man. 

And, that was the problem. 

The girl was not accustomed to "normal".  And, she really didn't know how to react to it. She wasn't sure how to act.  And she felt very bad about herself for the things that she had gone through. She felt branded and like everyone could tell that she was "bad".  She desperately needed counseling but she didn't realize that. 

She wasn't with David for very long. She didn't do right by him. She fell into a very deep depression.  And, then she attempted suicide.  

She's Crazy!!

 Around 40 years old.

She was talking to her mother on the phone and expressed something to her that her sister had said that had upset her. 

Her mother became angry and disgusted and said "don't listen to her!!!  She's crazy!!!!" And then called her by her sister's name. Her mother was confused as to which daughter she was talking to. 

She had always known how her mother felt about her, but hearing her say it and hearing the disdain in her voice ......

Later she would tell her, "you're hard to love.

Ed - 4

 They were sitting out in front of the apartment building. The girl had never seen Ed look so nice. His hair looked neat and had hairspray on it. 

She wanted to pay him a compliment so she told him that he looked nice and gently patted his hair.

"Great!!!!  Thanks!!!  Are you happy now??", he screamed...as he used his hand to completely mess up his hair and then picked his nose and smeared it into his moustache.